The next 4 days are bittersweet for this momma. My "babies" will be turning 2. My "big kids" finish up their last day of school. Another year gone by. I get reflective this time of year. Wondering if I've done enough, said enough, not said enough, shared enough, taught enough, modeled enough, and enjoyed/loved/laughed enough.
This wasn't just another status. I truly am reflective. Although encouraging words from friends are nice, I certainly didn't post it just so that they could say "You are a wonderful mom. You are doing a great job. etc..."
Mothering is such a hard but rewarding job. Such a fine line to walk between being the parent and being the friend.
I have about 50 books on how to do the job better, more effectively, creatively, parenting girls, parenting boys and on and on.
But as one of my precious friends commented on my fb status, she reminded me of the One who can help me above all in this mothering journey. As well as the only Book that can guide me in all aspects of my life, not just parenting. From that very book, this passage of scripture, from 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 came to mind: "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest in me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
I am weak without Christ. I am weak when I'm not daily walking with and abiding in Him. So to Eli, EK, Zane and Zander, may you know how much your momma loves you. May you know how I long to be a daily example of Christ in your life. But as you already know, I am not always what I want (or need) to be. I continue to try to find the balance that we all need. I know how to achieve that balance. I know where it comes from. I pray that I will only get better at modeling the love of Christ to you. I pray that I will bear more fruit. It seems that too often my branch is too disconnected from The Vine. I also pray that as I grow in God, you will too.
One final thought I leave you with is a quote I read in a daily devotional.
"Anything I do right as a mom is because of my constant dialogs with God. Anything I do wrong as a mom is because of trying to do things in my own strength and slap wearing myself out." (Lysa TerKeurst)
This not only applies to being a mom, but it applies to every aspect of your life. Love God. Abide in Him. Rest in Him. Walk with Him. He will make your paths straight when crooked seems to be the only way you are going.
As this school year comes to a close for the big kids and the little boys turn another year older, I am reflective. I have enjoyed another precious year on this Earth with the 4 of you. I am so blessed and honored that God gave each of you to me. May you always know first, of HIS love for you and second, of my love for you!
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